Been disappointed, I suppose. And not surprised by your honesty. [ Because Savage has never struck him as the type to spare anyone's feelings for any reason.
The other question... Considering how Dirk had behaved with everyone, it's an understandable conclusion that that may've been the only kind of "closeness" he was capable of.
After all the heart to hearts he and Dirk had about mutually not wanting to be anyone's dirty secret, and about respecting each other, it's surprising Dirk had never mentioned him to Savage at all. K's left to assume he'd had his reasons. Not like he can ask him now. ]
That's a rather personal question. [ Instead of being flustered, though, he redirects the proverbial spotlight onto Savage. ] No one but my friends have ever expressed an interest in my love life. [ A beat. ] Does this mean we're friends?
It makes no sense to lie as far as I'm concerned. It would cheapen the gesture if I faked it. [There were certain aspects of his life that he had once lied about to protect his little brother Feral, but that no longer needed to be the case.
Dirk had been an interesting one, outrageous personality and straight forward. They had had some very serious conversations where he had admitted things that he hadn't even told Maul. He wouldn't call them friends, but their association had been pleasurable on multiple fronts. If Dirk could manage such a connection with him, he assumed it wasn't just about sex with anyone else that the blond would have a go with.
He had never asked about Dirk's other associates, and Dirk had not brought it up. He had seen now and again how people reacted to Dirk on the network though.]
The fact you call it a love life is indication enough of what your association had been. [Not just sex then. An emotional connection.] Why would you want to be friends with someone like me? That's not something my species does well.
[ A conclusion K won't confirm or deny right now, because there isn't really a reason to. If he thought there was even the barest chance in hell Dirk would return to Trench, he'd lay out the full truth so Savage could finally really understand the situation... the situation that Dirk should have respected them both enough to have explained himself, probably, but—
But Dirk's gone for good. K knows it with the certainty of someone who's lost nearly every last person he's ever been close with. They never come back. It seems best to let the past remain the past, regardless of whether there's any real chance for a friendship with Savage. And he's sort of hoping there is. ]
Same thing's said about my kind. Mainly by humans, mind you, who think they know everything. Hasn't stopped me from having friends.
[ As for why he'd want to... ]
I like your honesty. I like our conversations. I think I'd like being your friend. [ No point being coy about it. ]
[The fact that K didn't divulge any more than his guess on their association was questionable as best, but he didn't care to quest further for answers. It made sense why Dirk had stopped coming around and ended things between them if K had developed something far more solid. It was more than he could give, more than he even considered giving to someone else.
His was a society built on hardship where close associates came and went without too much risk of emotional attachment. They had a good time and Nightbrothers fought for each other if they had something to lose, but it was a risk that few took. A Nightsister or any number of creature on their planet could snatch away what they had in an instant after all. So Dirk just breaking it off was something he had no problem accepting as what it was.
He assumed it meant that K had been hit harder when Dirk had left anyway. Probably one of the many reasons not to speak further on the subject.]
Humans gave you the capacity to mimic emotions for their benefit, but from what you've said, they seem to forget that means you have the capacity for emotional attachment. [Some humans liked to forget a lot of what their designs yielded. He never understood the hatred of the droids; they were stupid but followed orders.
He issue a low snort from his nose, a noise of suspicious disbelief.] Are you certain you don't have a few loose circuits? Nightbrothers aren't supposed to have friends, so... [Well, here goes then.] So I never learned how to let it happen.
[That was the barebones of it. He had been around long enough to understand friendship, but after a life of refusing to form one, it was tough to get over the hurdle to accepting his need for associates that actually wanted to be around him.]
Forget or simply don't care, either's as likely as the other. Not to mention their habitual lack of foresight.
[ The circuits remark gets a quiet sound of amusement from him. It's nice having his identity acknowledged, even with the sarcasm. ] Entirely possible. Don't think there's anyone here who knows enough to help with my maintenance now. Dirk was the last.
[ ... okay, so some confirmation that Dirk was more than just a "good time" to him. It's not that he even minds Savage knowing, but more that he doesn't think Savage would care for the sentimental details at this point. Or possibly ever. But who knows.
He can certainly relate to not knowing how to have friends, as well as being socialised to avoid forming such connections with others. Attachments could "compromise" the integrity of an android's programming in ways their human masters disapprove of, which would invariably result in termination in his home universe. But he's been free of that threat for several years now, and it's allowed him to develop far beyond his original programming. To where he's now willingly offering friendship to someone whom most would probably never consider — the close association with Maul likely doesn't help matters... How many have ever even tried having a real conversation with Savage, he wonders. ]
So you'll be starting from scratch. But it isn't impossible to learn these things. [ A pause. ] Do you want to have a friend? I think that's a good place to start, since friendship has to be mutual to work.
Humans seem particularly arrogant and narcissitic in your world. They are restricted to a single planet, yes?
[Savage made a noise at the admittance, and it seemed to solidify many of the unanswered aspects of Dirk's relations with others. The young human had been quite a prodigy when it came to mechanics, but such skills were common enough where he was from. He knew the basics, but there were others.]
There are a few from where I'm from who have good and even excellent mechanical maintenance skills. You would have to trust them enough to get close. [Or perhaps K had already found someone else; he'd leave the option open.
He shook his head a little, sensing that K might be one to understand what others didn't seem to be able to grasp. Even his brother pushed at him to form attachments and connections on a level that would be considered friendship, assuming that it would help with his disposition and ability to fit in. Maul clearly forgot that the more connections made, the more there was to lose when thing inevitably turned to war.]
I don't know. I've never considered a close connection outside of my own species. It's forbidden. We serve only. [Which made it difficult to know what he wanted when he didn't know what it was he was missing out.] Is friendship worth what it will cost?
[ Dryly: ] If only. They use my kind to rapidly colonise other planets for them, then spread to those. [ It seems inevitable that humanity will remain the dominant species in his universe, at least if they manage not to completely destroy themselves first. And theoretically, as an unaging android, he could live to see how his universe develops over thousands of years, if not more... but realistically, humans will attempt to dispose of him long before then. But it's a fascinating prospect, living through the rise and fall of civilisations. Even better would be getting to explore space freely. ]
Have to trust them not to tamper with things they shouldn't, too. [ It's said thoughtfully, as though he's giving the idea consideration. Because he is. His trust doesn't extend very far with strangers, but perhaps if he could get to know those people first. It isn't clear whether Darth Imperius is counted among them, but K has found him agreeable thus far. ]
For me? It has been worth it. I value every friendship I've had, even once my friends are gone. [ A thoughtful pause as he chooses his words. Their situations are similar enough, he thinks, that maybe it'll help to frame it that way. ] And neither of us have to serve, here. We don't have to be slaves. You can choose to have things that you were previously denied, if you want to.
[ Like friendships. Maybe even friendships with droids! Or at least one android who is himself still learning what life can be outside of slavery. ]
Then your kind are always in service of some kind then. Humans are also the most common species in the galaxy as well, and they've spent a very long time spreading and breeding. [As long as they left Dathomir alone, he didn't care where they went. That planet belonged to the Nightkin, and they would guard it and its secrets to the last man, woman and child.
Or so he had been instructed as a kit. They didn't welcome strangers unless it was to suit their own agenda. Even still, strangers weren't allowed to stay long. Mother Talzin had made that mistake once he had found out, and it had cost her his elder brother. Humans always took.]
That would be difficult. Trusting is difficult when your innermost secrets are available for anyone to tamper with. I know a little of mechanical maintenance if you absolutely need someone. [It wasn't an offer that he made lightly. He hadn't had a lot of experience with the inner workings of droids, except when it came to destroying them. However, he knew how to maintain a ship with a hyperdrive, so that had to count for something if K absolutely needed something desperately. That's what... friends did, right?
Savage was quiet for a time, thinking about what K said before sighing from his nose.] I wouldn't know how to be a friend even if I wanted to be one. And I will always serve; it's my purpose in life and... [He trailed off because there was always something in the back of his head about service. It was the magic that had twisted him, that forced loyalty he could never break free of without Talzin's permission.]
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no subject
The other question... Considering how Dirk had behaved with everyone, it's an understandable conclusion that that may've been the only kind of "closeness" he was capable of.
After all the heart to hearts he and Dirk had about mutually not wanting to be anyone's dirty secret, and about respecting each other, it's surprising Dirk had never mentioned him to Savage at all. K's left to assume he'd had his reasons. Not like he can ask him now. ]
That's a rather personal question. [ Instead of being flustered, though, he redirects the proverbial spotlight onto Savage. ] No one but my friends have ever expressed an interest in my love life. [ A beat. ] Does this mean we're friends?
no subject
Dirk had been an interesting one, outrageous personality and straight forward. They had had some very serious conversations where he had admitted things that he hadn't even told Maul. He wouldn't call them friends, but their association had been pleasurable on multiple fronts. If Dirk could manage such a connection with him, he assumed it wasn't just about sex with anyone else that the blond would have a go with.
He had never asked about Dirk's other associates, and Dirk had not brought it up. He had seen now and again how people reacted to Dirk on the network though.]
The fact you call it a love life is indication enough of what your association had been. [Not just sex then. An emotional connection.] Why would you want to be friends with someone like me? That's not something my species does well.
no subject
But Dirk's gone for good. K knows it with the certainty of someone who's lost nearly every last person he's ever been close with. They never come back. It seems best to let the past remain the past, regardless of whether there's any real chance for a friendship with Savage. And he's sort of hoping there is. ]
Same thing's said about my kind. Mainly by humans, mind you, who think they know everything. Hasn't stopped me from having friends.
[ As for why he'd want to... ]
I like your honesty. I like our conversations. I think I'd like being your friend. [ No point being coy about it. ]
no subject
His was a society built on hardship where close associates came and went without too much risk of emotional attachment. They had a good time and Nightbrothers fought for each other if they had something to lose, but it was a risk that few took. A Nightsister or any number of creature on their planet could snatch away what they had in an instant after all. So Dirk just breaking it off was something he had no problem accepting as what it was.
He assumed it meant that K had been hit harder when Dirk had left anyway. Probably one of the many reasons not to speak further on the subject.]
Humans gave you the capacity to mimic emotions for their benefit, but from what you've said, they seem to forget that means you have the capacity for emotional attachment. [Some humans liked to forget a lot of what their designs yielded. He never understood the hatred of the droids; they were stupid but followed orders.
He issue a low snort from his nose, a noise of suspicious disbelief.] Are you certain you don't have a few loose circuits? Nightbrothers aren't supposed to have friends, so... [Well, here goes then.] So I never learned how to let it happen.
[That was the barebones of it. He had been around long enough to understand friendship, but after a life of refusing to form one, it was tough to get over the hurdle to accepting his need for associates that actually wanted to be around him.]
no subject
[ The circuits remark gets a quiet sound of amusement from him. It's nice having his identity acknowledged, even with the sarcasm. ] Entirely possible. Don't think there's anyone here who knows enough to help with my maintenance now. Dirk was the last.
[ ... okay, so some confirmation that Dirk was more than just a "good time" to him. It's not that he even minds Savage knowing, but more that he doesn't think Savage would care for the sentimental details at this point. Or possibly ever. But who knows.
He can certainly relate to not knowing how to have friends, as well as being socialised to avoid forming such connections with others. Attachments could "compromise" the integrity of an android's programming in ways their human masters disapprove of, which would invariably result in termination in his home universe. But he's been free of that threat for several years now, and it's allowed him to develop far beyond his original programming. To where he's now willingly offering friendship to someone whom most would probably never consider — the close association with Maul likely doesn't help matters... How many have ever even tried having a real conversation with Savage, he wonders. ]
So you'll be starting from scratch. But it isn't impossible to learn these things. [ A pause. ] Do you want to have a friend? I think that's a good place to start, since friendship has to be mutual to work.
no subject
[Savage made a noise at the admittance, and it seemed to solidify many of the unanswered aspects of Dirk's relations with others. The young human had been quite a prodigy when it came to mechanics, but such skills were common enough where he was from. He knew the basics, but there were others.]
There are a few from where I'm from who have good and even excellent mechanical maintenance skills. You would have to trust them enough to get close. [Or perhaps K had already found someone else; he'd leave the option open.
He shook his head a little, sensing that K might be one to understand what others didn't seem to be able to grasp. Even his brother pushed at him to form attachments and connections on a level that would be considered friendship, assuming that it would help with his disposition and ability to fit in. Maul clearly forgot that the more connections made, the more there was to lose when thing inevitably turned to war.]
I don't know. I've never considered a close connection outside of my own species. It's forbidden. We serve only. [Which made it difficult to know what he wanted when he didn't know what it was he was missing out.] Is friendship worth what it will cost?
forever late but wanted to come back to this
Have to trust them not to tamper with things they shouldn't, too. [ It's said thoughtfully, as though he's giving the idea consideration. Because he is. His trust doesn't extend very far with strangers, but perhaps if he could get to know those people first. It isn't clear whether Darth Imperius is counted among them, but K has found him agreeable thus far. ]
For me? It has been worth it. I value every friendship I've had, even once my friends are gone. [ A thoughtful pause as he chooses his words. Their situations are similar enough, he thinks, that maybe it'll help to frame it that way. ] And neither of us have to serve, here. We don't have to be slaves. You can choose to have things that you were previously denied, if you want to.
[ Like friendships. Maybe even friendships with droids! Or at least one android who is himself still learning what life can be outside of slavery. ]
<3 <3
Or so he had been instructed as a kit. They didn't welcome strangers unless it was to suit their own agenda. Even still, strangers weren't allowed to stay long. Mother Talzin had made that mistake once he had found out, and it had cost her his elder brother. Humans always took.]
That would be difficult. Trusting is difficult when your innermost secrets are available for anyone to tamper with. I know a little of mechanical maintenance if you absolutely need someone. [It wasn't an offer that he made lightly. He hadn't had a lot of experience with the inner workings of droids, except when it came to destroying them. However, he knew how to maintain a ship with a hyperdrive, so that had to count for something if K absolutely needed something desperately. That's what... friends did, right?
Savage was quiet for a time, thinking about what K said before sighing from his nose.] I wouldn't know how to be a friend even if I wanted to be one. And I will always serve; it's my purpose in life and... [He trailed off because there was always something in the back of his head about service. It was the magic that had twisted him, that forced loyalty he could never break free of without Talzin's permission.]